Saturday, July 24, 2010

Abide In Him

I haven't written since my diagnosis of glioblastoma, which is a type of brain tumor. Really we were on a fast moving train between the initial "shadow" that showed up in a CAT scan in St. Loius, to the the full blown diagnosis a few days later back in Kansas at KU Medical Center. It does all seem a bit of blur, especially after the biopsy was done and before radiation treatment began. MD Anderson, the huge cancer medical center in Houston gave us a call with the possibility of operating to remove the tumor. I must say, I made that trip thinking "I don't know about this Lord!"


After a couple days of testing and a special MRI, the Docs said this is a "No Go!" To tell you truth the I had already gotten that message from the Lord! The thing is though that we had make that trip so we could assure ourselves that we got a second opinion, and would never question that we were moving forward in the right direction. God is so good about that reassurance!

Well, we are now done with 4 out of six weeks of radiation and chemo, and aside from being bit fatigued, I am handling it quite well. I have lost some hair, but have very cute hats and scarves for cover (I know, such vanity!).

My family has been such a blessing by taking turns getting me to daily radiation treatments in Kansas; everyone has taken a turn; my son and his fiance, a good friend who just happened to visit, and my sisters. The extra added bonus--quality time with people I love--blessings upon blessings!

That brings me to my whole attitude about having this illness. I know the Lord has this whole thing under control! From the moment I heard the word "shadow" I knew this was a brain tumor and and I also knew the Lord would help me handle everything that would be happening to me. God's grace is sufficient for me. He also gave me a verse about abiding in Him. I am still working on that . . . it means to remain in Him. I intend to do just that!

Monday, May 31, 2010

Biblical Manhood and Womanhood (hey, it needs to be said)

Years ago after becoming a Christian I wrestled with this . . . probably because I had become entrenched in feminist ideology. After only a few years of studying the scriptures it was all made clear to me. It wasn't complicated at all, God has a plan, a purpose and a design. The Danvers statement helps clarify things in a more succinct manner than I ever could though, and luckily for me they allow for any and all to copy and disperse their well written statement. (It's a sad commentary on the modern church that they had to though, isn't it!)



The Danvers Statement on Biblical Manhood and Womanhood


In December, 1987, the newly-formed Council on Biblical Manhood and Womanhood met in Danvers, Massachusetts, to compose the Danvers Statement on Biblical Manhood and Womanhood. Prior to the listing of the actual affirmations that comprise the Danvers Statement, we have included a section detailing contemporary developments that serve as the rationale for these affirmations. We offer this statement to the evangelical world, knowing that it will stimulate healthy discussion, hoping that it will gain widespread assent.

Rationale | Affirmations

Rationale

We have been moved in our purpose by the following contemporary developments which we observe with deep concern:

The widespread uncertainty and confusion in our culture regarding the complementary differences between masculinity and femininity;

the tragic effects of this confusion in unraveling the fabric of marriage woven by God out of the beautiful and diverse strands of manhood and womanhood;

the increasing promotion given to feminist egalitarianism with accompanying distortions or neglect of the glad harmony portrayed in Scripture between the loving, humble leadership of redeemed husbands and the intelligent, willing support of that leadership by redeemed wives;

the widespread ambivalence regarding the values of motherhood, vocational homemaking, and the many ministries historically performed by women;

the growing claims of legitimacy for sexual relationships which have Biblically and historically been considered illicit or perverse, and the increase in pornographic portrayal of human sexuality;

the upsurge of physical and emotional abuse in the family;

the emergence of roles for men and women in church leadership that do not conform to Biblical teaching but backfire in the crippling of Biblically faithful witness;

the increasing prevalence and acceptance of hermeneutical oddities devised to reinterpret apparently plain meanings of Biblical texts;

the consequent threat to Biblical authority as the clarity of Scripture is jeopardized and the accessibility of its meaning to ordinary people is withdrawn into the restricted realm of technical ingenuity;

and behind all this the apparent accommodation of some within the church to the spirit of the age at the expense of winsome, radical Biblical authenticity which in the power of the Holy Spirit may reform rather than reflect our ailing culture.

Affirmations

Based on our understanding of Biblical teachings, we affirm the following:

Both Adam and Eve were created in God's image, equal before God as persons and distinct in their manhood and womanhood (Gen 1:26-27, 2:18).

Distinctions in masculine and feminine roles are ordained by God as part of the created order, and should find an echo in every human heart (Gen 2:18, 21-24; 1 Cor 11:7-9; 1 Tim 2:12-14).

Adam's headship in marriage was established by God before the Fall, and was not a result of sin (Gen 2:16-18, 21-24, 3:1-13; 1 Cor 11:7-9).

The Fall introduced distortions into the relationships between men and women (Gen 3:1-7, 12, 16).

In the home, the husband's loving, humble headship tends to be replaced by domination or passivity; the wife's intelligent, willing submission tends to be replaced by usurpation or servility.

In the church, sin inclines men toward a worldly love of power or an abdication of spiritual responsibility, and inclines women to resist limitations on their roles or to neglect the use of their gifts in appropriate ministries.

The Old Testament, as well as the New Testament, manifests the equally high value and dignity which God attached to the roles of both men and women (Gen 1:26-27, 2:18; Gal 3:28). Both Old and New Testaments also affirm the principle of male headship in the family and in the covenant community (Gen 2:18; Eph 5:21-33; Col 3:18-19; 1 Tim 2:11-15).

Redemption in Christ aims at removing the distortions introduced by the curse.
In the family, husbands should forsake harsh or selfish leadership and grow in love and care for their wives; wives should forsake resistance to their husbands' authority and grow in willing, joyful submission to their husbands' leadership (Eph 5:21-33; Col 3:18-19; Tit 2:3-5; 1 Pet 3:1-7).

In the church, redemption in Christ gives men and women an equal share in the blessings of salvation; nevertheless, some governing and teaching roles within the church are restricted to men (Gal 3:28; 1 Cor 11:2-16; 1 Tim 2:11-15).

In all of life Christ is the supreme authority and guide for men and women, so that no earthly submission-domestic, religious, or civil-ever implies a mandate to follow a human authority into sin (Dan 3:10-18; Acts 4:19-20, 5:27-29; 1 Pet 3:1-2).

In both men and women a heartfelt sense of call to ministry should never be used to set aside Biblical criteria for particular ministries (1 Tim 2:11-15, 3:1-13; Tit 1:5-9). Rather, Biblical teaching should remain the authority for testing our subjective discernment of God's will.

With half the world's population outside the reach of indigenous evangelism; with countless other lost people in those societies that have heard the gospel; with the stresses and miseries of sickness, malnutrition, homelessness, illiteracy, ignorance, aging, addiction, crime, incarceration, neuroses, and loneliness, no man or woman who feels a passion from God to make His grace known in word and deed need ever live without a fulfilling ministry for the glory of Christ and the good of this fallen world (1 Cor 12:7-21).

We are convinced that a denial or neglect of these principles will lead to increasingly destructive consequences in our families, our churches, and the culture at large.


We grant permission and encourage interested persons to use, reproduce, and distribute the Danvers Statement. Printed copies of a brochure are available for a small fee. Visit the CBMW Store or contact us to place an order.

Tuesday, May 4, 2010

Rock Out



When I found out Betty and her husband were going to make me a "Grammy" I immediately wanted to go shopping for baby clothes. Unfortunately, I wasn't going to find out the gender of erstwhile named "Nigel" until he/she was born. Well, that puts a cramp in one's style for buying baby things . . . they are all very gender specific with either football, baseball themes or pink, very pink feminine ruffles.

So, I had to tame my urge with the thought, that OK, I will concentrate on buying one big thing. What one big thing could I get that they would need, and I say need, because the parents involved here are very practical. No frivolous purchases please. Well, then it had to be a rocking chair.

When dealing with infants, if memory serves me correct, when trying to calm them some type of rocking is necessary. Having a chair makes the process so much easier! It's also great for nursing. I expect it will be a stress reliever for anyone involved.

So my quest began. I really would have liked to purchase an antique rocker, but after looking a while without much success I settled on a newly made oak hand-rubbed rocker made by inmates at the Fort Leavenworth DB (disciplinary barracks). Not only are they beautifully crafted used dowels (instead of staples) they come close to the design that Dad of baby-yet-to-be-named favored; the Cracker Barrel wooden rocker. So, hopefully I scored some points there.

Now that the gift is purchased, I await that very special call! My bag is packed, I will load up the rocker and I can be at their home in 4 1/2 hours. Get ready to rock out!

Monday, March 22, 2010

TV Law and Order: NOT

Last night Ward and I were flipping channels and this show caught our eye. We are not regular followers, we rarely watch any current TV shows, but the idea of a pregnant teen's boyfriend going on trial for killing the unborn baby of his girlfriend by beating it death in the womb caught our attention. As we watched there were subtleties about the case that we couldn't figure out. It became curiouser and curiouser, until BAM it hit us right between the eyes.

The show is Law and Order: Special Vicitms Unit and it was the episode titled Rockabye. Here is TV.com's summary:


After sixteen-year-old Lauren Westley loses her unborn child due to a severe abdominal beating, her father's insistance that Lauren was raped leads detectives to the baby's father, but it isn't long before the detectives realise that Lauren was an active party in her own beating, and the two teens had found it necessary to take the steps they did because the abortion clinic kept putting off Lauren's request for an appointment. Novak faces a tough opponent in her own office when she and Branch disagree over the appropriate action to be taken against Wayne Mortens, the young girl's boyfriend.


Isn't that interesting wording, that the two teens found it "necessary to take the steps they did"? No, they couldn't just have the baby and give it up for adoption, that thought never occurred to them. But I digress, the plot line follows the story as to the plight of their dire situation, that after having tried for two whole weeks to get an abortion. You see the doctor at the abortion clinic said she had a fever at 22 weeks and she shouldn't have the procedure done due to risk of infection. But she called the clinic everyday (gosh sometimes three times a day) for two weeks and then because she was past 24 weeks they NO CHOICE but to take matters into their own hands, gee these poor kids were forced to brutalize the fetus. Oh the inhumanity of it . . . as their case is told in court about how the cruel doctor kept them at bay, the judge realizes in a light bulb moment that here we have a very simple case of medical malpractice! This doctor obviously was subverting abortions!! It was the doctor's fault that they had to kill their baby, oh wait, we're only allowed to call it a "fetus" in court . . . but it was the doctor's fault that they had to terminate the pregnancy in the only way their feeble little teen minds could come up with . . . they pummeled it to death. Having aroused the sympathy of the entire court room, the judge says, let's let these poor kids go. Please see to it that the doctor is arrested on grounds of criminal malpractice (or some such charge).

So the twisted logic of the court seems to say, because the doctor didn't kill the baby, if was his fault the baby was killed!

Now I realize that I am getting all worked up about some idiot television show, except that I am told that these shows are based on real cases. And if that is true . . . God help us all!

Friday, March 19, 2010

Meet Me In St. Louis

Spring break is always a challenge. Stay home and be bored or venture out and try to do a road trip with the family. This year I got to do a bit of both. The guys (Ward and the Beav) headed off for a four day weekend of college wrestling magic with the finals in Omaha. It is a dream come true for Ward, who wrestled in high school. The Beav is just going along for the male bonding!

I, on the other hand, did a singular road trip of my own to do some serious female bonding. I spent the first half of the week in St. Louis, visiting a getting-to-be-very-pregnant Betty. She and the expectant father-to-be are amazingly informed and calmly ready. They are attending Bradley classes, watching birthing videos, reading and carefully monitoring protein intake. If they were any more prepared they would be having twins!

We went into St. Louis for some shopping and a short trip to the Art Museum. I was scolded by the concierge for loitering too close to a painting, and all I was doing was pointing out some wonderful detail . . . I remarked later how horrible to have a job whose sole purpose is to be negative . . . "You're too close! Step away from the painting! Don't touch the artwork!"
After the museum we went to have lunch at a little Tea Shop in the city. A turkey panini, keemun tea and lemon blueberry cake and oh, I didn't have to eat the whole thing! We split it just the way we used to when having lunches out at Starbucks. I love having a daughter!

I finally got to see the inside of a Trader Joe's and buy some "two-buck chuck". It should really be called "three-buck chuck" now, and really it is an awesome price for fairly decent wine.

We did some other shopping at Whole Foods, whose nickname is "Whole Paycheck" and I can see why, but really what a wonderful store . . . everything a "crunchy-granola-organic-mother-earth hippy" could possibly want.

The best part of the whole trip was seeing my daughter and her husband getting ready for my grand baby! They are waiting to know the sex until birth, which is wonderful but makes it very hard to buy cute little baby outfits. There are no unisex outfits and it has been hard to wait, but we did get to one little shop where I got to purchase the cutest little diapers and covers. It helped the craving to buy all things baby . . . but only a little!

Friday, February 19, 2010

Transformations

Things are changing. Things cannot remain the same, though we wish it we cannot make time stand still.The next year will be a time of great transformation.

I will go from being a mom to also being a grandmother. That is a change I look forward to. As is the change of having a daughter-in-law. Expanding family is a wondrous and wonderful thing!

Then there is the transformation of the baby of the family, Beav, into a young adult. I know that this has been a gradual thing, and the chrysalis has been dropping away for quite some time now, but there are definitive moments when you feel it is done, a finished thing. That happened today when we had one of those chance conversations while riding in the car together. This young man talked about taking classes next year as a senior that would enable him to get college credits. And he added, "That would be a good thing, don't you think?" Huh?! Is this the same child that was arguing with me six months ago about . . . well, about everything?! These moments can catch you off guard, but, because this is my third child I actually recognize milestones when I see them and savor them.

A more traumatic transformation looms a few months down the road. We will be leaving the military lifestyle as Ward puts in his retirement papers and heads off to the civilian world. This is a huge change. For over twenty-six years we have lived and loved this way of life. As challenging as it has been, it has also been a source of pride that Ward has been allowed to serve this wonderful nation as a leader of its young men in uniform. He was good at it, and I like to think I was good at supporting him in doing his job well.

However, we won't look back with any regrets. We look forward to finding out what God has planned for us next. Stay tuned for how he helps us become first time home owners and transition out into "the real world."

Saturday, January 30, 2010

Dinner with Robert Gates, Kansan of the Year

Ward and I were in Topeka last night to celebrate the 149th birthday of Kansas at the annual Native Sons and Daughters of Kansas banquet. No, we are not natives of Kansas, but lucky guests invited by a military foundation. After arriving and running a political gauntlet (some type of Republican convention was taking place in the great hall next to our dinner) we also saw in attendance four of the state's six members of Congress, Gov. Mark Parkinson and U.S. Health and Human Services Secretary Kathleen Sebelius. But, this was not an occasion for political hobnobbing. This was an evening to recognize and honor U.S. Defense Secretary Roberts Gates as he accepted the Kansan of the Year award.

Mr. Gates, who is originally from Wichita, spoke of growing up in Kansas, "My youth in Kansas was rich with good and modest people. Surrounded by such people, character and integrity, Kansas values, and Kansas common sense became the bedrock of my life."

And what a life! After serving in the CIA for some 27 years, he went on to Texas A&M University as its president, and from that post he was named secretary of defense. He has served under eight presidents.

Yet, he stood before us last evening as a humble man of sincere character reflecting on lessons he had learned from growing up in Kansas. He spoke in particular of his high school track coach Bob Timmons' life lessons in leadership, integrity, discipline, motivating people and treating all of them respectfully. And because Mr. Timmons was in the room last night, seated at the same table as Mr. Gates' own 96-year-old mother, he got to give a very personal, "Coach, thanks."

Mr. Gates said, "I will always consider myself first and foremost a kid from Kansas who got lucky." He made us also feel lucky to be in the same room on this very special occasion. And when you work inside the beltway in Washington D.C. I would say that is nothing short of a miracle. Good work Kansas!

Tuesday, January 26, 2010

Do You Remember Your First Car?

Of course you do! But I am so much older that when my son asked me about it I really had to think. I mean the first car I drove was my Mom's blue Nova, which was a piece of, well, you know! And my brother would also let me borrow his very unreliable blue Ford Pinto hatchback. Seriously, when it wouldn't start we would pop the hood and hit some part of the engine with what ever was handy, and for me it was usually a book. That would dislodge or re-engage whatever part that needed lodging or re-engaging and then the car would start. This was 1973 and I know that my Dad had a truck (that I was not allowed to drive EVER) because one of the cars I was driving was a standard on-the-column and it would always slip ot of gear on my way to work, and this always on a hill! So my Dad said he would follow me to help . . . and you guess it, it slipped out of gear and rolled right back into my Dad's truck. Hey, I TOLD him it would do that! But I guess he thought I would know to brake.

Anyway, after working many hard nights as a waitress at Ramada Inn (my first job) I saved enough to get my own car. This was the era of Datsun and Honda and Toyota and those cute little cars, which of course many of my friends drove. But this is what my $400 could get for me at that time:

It was a light blue 1965 Bonneville. Good grief it was a block long and none of my friends would ride anywhere with me. But it was reliable and got me back and forth to school and work.

Monday, January 4, 2010

New Year, New Food



We began our New Year with lots of family in and celebrating our favorite thing to do: Eat! For our first dinner I made Julia Child's Beef Bourguignon. A day long process, but very worth it! Savory chunks of tender beef in a butter laced au jus with carrots, mushrooms and pearl onions are ladled over crusty bread. Sigh. Make that a "French sigh!"

New Year's Day was perfect for a foodie as well. We began the day with Belgian waffles, made from scratch by the men of the house. Topped with cherries and whipped cream. Whoah! Did they taste especially good because I didn't have to make them? I did try to sneak in and give advice, but was finally booted out! Hey, I was just trying to show them what "soft peaks" are!!

We put a brisket on for the New Year's Day meal. Non-traditional, I know, but great to feed a crowd that maybe wouldn't have like my German sauerkraut, meatballs and mashed potatotes meal. And to tell you the truth, I liked the brisket better too! I had planned to serve some sauteed green beans, assorted rolls, and baked macaroni and cheese with the brisket. My plans went a little awry due to tobogganing! And my niece brought too really delicious sides; a corn casserole and a pineapple casserole. That together with my yellow baked macaroni and cheese made for a very uniform palette on the dinner plate as I somehow didn't get those green beans cooked! Oh well, it was all delicious! Dessert was Ghirardelli double chocolate brownies topped with vanilla ice cream.


The final morning I made an old family favorite, though to tell you the truth we usually made them for a light dinner or dessert. But I had the ingredients and I knew it was my last chance to make what I grew up calling German Pancakes, but are simply crepes filled with sweetened whipped cream cheese and topped with cinnamon sugar. Oy! Very good, with lots of hot tea or coffee.